Moan tones on your mobile

Porn star Jenna Jameson is now hawking her "moan tones."
For $2.50 fans of the ubiquitous porno queen can choose from a variety of moans, grunts and lurid sexual noises all recorded by the blond bombshell.
If that's not enough, Jameson will talk dirty to you when you phones rings, in English or Spanish.
Jameson, who recently wrote a best-selling memoir, has launched the venture with Wicked Wireless, a mobile music and entertainment company.
Also available are color pictures of the porn star posing naked that can be displayed on your phone for $2.99.
Jameson's charms are already being downloaded in Argentina, Ecuador, Venezuela, and in a couple of weeks will be available from Mexico to Uruguay.
Latin American users can download a moan or a picture for $1.00 each, while U.S. customers will pay $2.50 for a moan and $2.99 for a wallpaper once the service is launched.
Some people were shocked, but others said they wanted more from the product.

 

Stripper wins damages

A stripper mauled by a tiger in an Ontario safari park has won $650,000 in damages because her scars meant she could no longer work, Canadian media said last week.
Jennifer-Anne Cowles was driving through the park nearly nine years ago with her then boyfriend when a tiger jumped into their car and tried to drag them away. The two insisted their windows had been shut when the tiger charged, although the park had challenged that.
The judge accepted the couple's testimony that the power windows had been inadvertently lowered when one of the big cats bumped against the car, frightening them.
In a ruling delivered last week Justice Jean MacFarland said she could only imagine the "stark terror experienced by these young people during this horrendous event."
She awarded Cowles over $650,000 in damages, almost half of it to compensate for income she would have made as a stripper.
 


 

 

Blunder like Beckham

Fans have a chance to kick the ball sent flying over the bar by David Beckham from the penalty spot in England's Euro 2004 quarter-final defeat by Portugal.
The winner of an ebay online auction will be allowed to kick the ball during halftime of a second division match between Wolverhampton Wanderers and Gillingham on February 19.
England captain Beckham skied his spot-kick during a penalty shootout against Portugal last June, which the tournament hosts went on to win 6-5. The match had ended 2-2.
The ball, which is on a world tour raising money for charity, was caught high in the stands of the Luz Stadium in Lisbon by a Spanish fan.
It was auctioned on ebay and after several fake bids, including one of 10 million euros, was sold in July for 28,000 euros (19,400 pounds) to Canadian-based internet casino Goldenpalace.com.

Pole wants pole out of kitchen

Piotr Kardys is a Pole with a problem -- a pole; in fact, a telephone pole in his kitchen.
It was erected without his permission by telephone operator TPSA and when he built a home on his property in 2001 he had to build around the offending object, which is how the pole ended up in his kitchen.
Local authorities said since no one objected when the pole went up, it was legal. Kardys, a businessman from Kolbuszowa, disputed this view and Poland's Supreme Administrative Court has now agreed with him.
But his problems aren't over. Local authorities rescinded the building permit for the pole and told TPSA to move it, but TPSA spokeswoman Izabella Szum said the company would appeal.
"We have to have a binding decision -- we could do it on our own, but you have to realise this is a big investment," she said.
 

Attractive car

A man in North Dakota, USA owns one hot car. Police said the dark purple Ford was stolen three times in six days.
Lt. Mike Wardzinski said the car was first reported stolen on Jan. 20. It was found and towed back to the man's house early Tuesday, only to disappear a few hours later. It was found later in the day.
The car was stolen again on Wednesday. Police recovered the vehicle the next day.
Wardzinski said there were no keys inside the car and the doors were locked each time the car was stolen. The owner told police it didn't look like anyone had forced their way into the car.
Police have no suspects and are investigating the case. Wardzinski said it appears someone else has a set of keys to the car.


 

Tailpiece

The doctor and his wife

A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast.
"You aren't so good in bed either!" he shouted and stormed off to work.
By midmorning, he decided he'd better make amends and phoned home. After many rings, his wife picked up the phone.
"What took you so long to answer?"
"I was in bed."
"What were you doing in bed this late?"
"Getting a second opinion."