Dr. ABBAS 

High Blood Pressure

Q. My husband who is 32 years old has been diagnosed as having high blood pressure recently. We are so worried, depressed and annoyed that he had to get this disease at this young age. Do we have any other methods apart from taking medication for high blood pressure? Concerned Reader, Tanga.

A. Discovering that your husband has high blood pressure is not a thing to feel depressed or annoyed about. One thing you should not let your husband feel sorry for himself. In fact, your husband has been very lucky. Your husband’s blood pressure has been found before it has had time to do any damage, and it has given him the opportunity to review the whole of his life and attitudes to keep him healthy. Everyone, regardless of the height of their blood pressure, should be doing it. Your husband has just been brought face to face with harsh facts of life earlier then most. Take advantage of the opportunity, do what is best for him, and let him enjoy life into a long and active old age. There are several ways apart from medication to bring pressure down. The first is change in life style. Some people react badly to constant stress at work or in the home. The person, who is always worrying, anxious or miserable and angry, is likely to be making his or her blood pressure problem worse. One needs to look into the area where you can reduce the stress. One needs to take out an hour in a day to relax and forget about your workload, your anger, or anxieties. The second thing is diet. Overweight people are more prone to high blood pressure than people of normal weight. If your husband is overweight and has high blood pressure, then he is at risk of its complications more than if he was lighter. If he has high blood pressure and is overweight, he has more reason than most to lose the weight. In fact if he does lose weight, he may lower his blood pressure. Thirdly, it is exercise. Many high blood pressure sufferers shy away from exercise in the belief that it may put up their pressure further. This is quite wrong. The correct form of exercise, started slowly, under your doctor’s advice and increased gradually as he becomes fitter, will help to lower, not raise his pressure. Walking, running, swimming, cycling are all excellent, provided that he does not fall into the trap of making them competitive. Explosive exercise like weight-lifting or the heavy field sports is unwise.

Desire in men

Q. I have my boy friend 24 years old and would like to know about men’s desires towards sex. What is desire and what are different desires men can have. Secondly, what is the difference between love and lust?
Concerned Reader, Lindi.

A. Desire is the urge to have sex. It begins in the brain. Guys have the reputation of being predators, of always feeling desire and being willing to do just about anything to appease it. While many guys fit this stereotype, there are lots who do not. Some guys are more interested in sports or academic studies than scoring with girls. For other guys the priority is to build a caring intimate relationship, and sex comes later. Others lack confidence in their sexuality or have a low level of desire, or feel shy or do not think they are attractive. There are also plenty of guys who do not want to have sex until marriage for religious or personal reasons. All of these guys end up battling other people’s conceptions of them. When it comes to taking action there are many guys who do not feel up to it. Taking the initiative in sexual relationships is nerve-wracking and plenty of guys are happy when the roles reverse. Loving someone means loving the whole person sexually and romantically. You enjoy that person’s company and are interested in what they are doing and thinking and you want that person to be happy. Feeling lust for some one means feeling intense desires for his or her body. Your interest focuses on the sexual pleasure you can get from being together.

Rimming

Q. I am 36 years old and was reading about rimming. What does rimming mean? What are its disadvantages if practised in reality?
Concerned Reader, Dar es Salaam.

A. Rimming means stimulating your partner’s anus with your tongue. Rimming brings saliva into contact with the anus. One can get easily infected if one touches the partner’s open sores on his or her anus, or you can infect the partner if you have open sores on your mouth. Herpes is also easily transferred during rimming, whether or not sores are present. It is possible to ingest faecal material while rimming, which means you can catch intestinal parasites if your partner has them as well as hepatitis A.