Dr. ABBAS 

Mumps

Q. I am 16 years old boy and have developed swelling of cheeks. I wonder what is it and what should be done about it?


Concerned Reader, DSM

A.You are suffering from Mumps is caused by a virus, which spread by droplet infection and affects mainly children of school age and young adults. The infective rate is not high and there is evidence that 30 to 40 percent of infections are clinically in apparent. Tender swelling of one or both parotid or salivary glands soon follows malaise, fever, and pain near the angle of the jaw. Parotid swelling alone is often the first feature. The swelling of the gland subside in a few days, and may be succeeded by swelling of previously unaffected gland. Orchitis means infection of testicles occurs in about one in four males who develop mumps after puberty; it is usually on one side only, but if is bilateral, sterility may be outcome. Obscure abdominal pain may be due to pancreatitis. Most cases of mumps can be diagnosed on clinical grounds alone, but the diagnosis can be confirmed in doubtful cases by the demonstration of antibodies in the blood or culture of virus from the saliva. Oral hygiene is important when the mouth is very dry due to lack of saliva. Apart from the relief of symptoms as they appear no other treatment is necessary.


Can I Have Orgasm?

Q. I am 17 years old and my boyfriend insists me to have anal sex. I would like to ask you that could I have orgasm while having anal sex? How should we go about having anal sex? Secondly, I have read about some thing called auto-fellatio. What is it and how do you do it?


Concerned Reader, DSM

A. The anus requires plenty of lubrication before you attempt anal sex. Unlike the vagina it does not secrete its own lubrication- so, to prevent painful friction, use lots of water based lubricating jelly, both on the anus and penis. Relaxing the anus can also facilitate penetration. It is important to use a strong condom to prevent the transmission of infection - the condom should be changed if anal sex is followed by vaginal sex. Since anal penetration does not stimulate the clitoris, women are unlikely to reach orgasm without additional stimulation. It can help if the man reaches his hand around the women during penetration and stimulates the clitoris. Having said this, some women find anal sex so erotic that they can reach orgasm without extra help. Men who receive anal penetration are likely to reach orgasm very easily because the highly sensitive prostate gland is directly stimulated. Prostate message, of any sort, usually results in rapid and easily climax. Response to your second part of the question is that auto-fellatio refers to the extremely difficult practice of a man stimulating his own penis using his mouth and tongue. Needless to say, one would need the skills of acrobat plus bones of India rubber. Auto-fellatio is most definitely not for the overweight. Warning - even attempting auto-fellatio is liable to give one stiff neck.



Should I cheat?

Q. I have been married for nearly three years, and my husband and I have had some problems with his lack of desire for sex. I am an exceptionally sexual person, but my sex drive has been suffocated to almost nothing. The problem is, I have become severely unsatisfied, and I have found myself seriously considering sleeping with other men. I cannot even fantasize about him anymore.


Concerned Reader, Mikumi

A. Sex is an important component of a relationship, no doubt about it, but it is certainly possible to keep a marriage going in spite of any sexual incompatibility, providing the other factors outweigh the sexual issues. But while you may need to get sexual satisfaction in addition to that provided by your husband, having an affair is not the way to go. What I would recommend is that you try masturbating. If you can have the additional orgasms you need this way, then your relationship could definitely survive. If masturbation does not work for you, if you absolutely need to have a man to get the satisfaction you need, then my advice is to end the relationship and look for someone who can keep you sexually satisfied. One reason I advise this is because there is almost no doubt that if you start having affairs, the relationship is going to collapse eventually anyway. But if your marriage falls apart because you were cheating on your husband that is going to cause a lot of acrimony, and you are going to look like the bad guy. There is also the risk that you might catch some sexually transmitted disease and then give it to your husband. That is not a risk under which he should be placed. So if masturbation is not a workable solution, be mature about this and end the marriage rather than try to get around the problem by having an affair.